tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15374623.post3682846047530142187..comments2023-11-02T06:43:49.663-04:00Comments on Watergate Summer: Eulogy to my Uncle Chuckenigma4everhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06589997090173140019noreply@blogger.comBlogger17125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15374623.post-41207697977860638832007-11-18T17:04:00.000-05:002007-11-18T17:04:00.000-05:00I think in many ways we as children do absorb what...I think in many ways we as children do absorb what we need to learn, I think for me, I was always looking to learn Something ...Chuck was so different then anyone in our family, I think it makes sense that it effected me..About my aunt one day...I think for me..I just wanted to write something about him...the obit in the paper said so little, it was so sad. And it didn't tell who he was, and how nice he was to children, it didn't even mention that he had been a teacher before he sold life insurance....that really bugged me...anyways....thank you all for letting me do something so self indulgent...enigma4everhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06589997090173140019noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15374623.post-53344444975590487762007-11-18T16:43:00.000-05:002007-11-18T16:43:00.000-05:00I think writing your thoughts out really does help...I think writing your thoughts out really does help deal with grief. Grief needs to be dealt with, no matter how delayed. I feel priviledged that you chose to share your memories with us. Now we too can remember mysteriously handsome Uncle Chuck and the quail and the dogs.<BR/><BR/>One day you may be able to make meaningful contact with your Aunt again. This may hold the key to your questions about Uncle Chuck's death. His memories must be very strong in you for you to write such a beautiful rememberance.<BR/><BR/>So many lessons there ...D.K. Raedhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01451065603615752038noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15374623.post-39222220732712525982007-11-18T13:17:00.000-05:002007-11-18T13:17:00.000-05:00thanks Prague: You know he had a slight accent, an...thanks Prague: You know he had a slight accent, and when he said that I thought it was very much a part of him...loving the moment- knowing when the sun needed to be appreciated....thank you....<BR/><BR/><BR/>Fran: everything you said is so true...even though it should be painful., it is better to just view it clearly...yeah...Nosebleed Problems...I totally understand what you are saying....In many ways it is funny that I am a nurse....I was used to being told to be quiet- tough it out., and yet I took care of all the older relatives..making them soup, taking them to dr appts when I could drive.....I was raised by these wonderful old aunts....I was so lucky...<BR/><BR/>and lessons along the way.....<BR/>namaste...enigma4everhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06589997090173140019noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15374623.post-46786895834891897632007-11-18T12:16:00.001-05:002007-11-18T12:16:00.001-05:00Indeed, a lovely tribute to a lovely man. The atti...Indeed, a lovely tribute to a lovely man. <BR/><BR/>The attitude that "You gotta love the sun.. and golf is kinda fun," really sounds like a Czech attitude to me. <BR/><BR/>I empathize with your loss.Praguetwinhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15481534213601084777noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15374623.post-8308727896088412332007-11-18T12:16:00.000-05:002007-11-18T12:16:00.000-05:00Hi Enigma~ I have a family with communication prob...Hi Enigma~ I have a family with communication problems too- minimizing things, and glossing over stuff. My Dad did not total car(s) because he was an alcoholic, it was because he had a "nosebleed & lost control of the car". Maybe he should have sought help from the Nosebleed Anonymous group? I guess his Sister decided she needed to tidy up his messy life & make the story pallitable. The siblings did him no favor by doing so. I cannot turn back time & insist they speak the truth--but I can speak it myself. Over time, I figured out who of the family I could handle, and have come to accept the others are who they are, and choose to minimize exposure to those who are toxic. You try to be centered and strong, and <BR/>I have even psyched myself into determining I would not be sucked in to any particular person's drama. I try to find compassion for them- but also realize I must find balance in my own life. Families can be a tricky thing, Eh?Franhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14198689517878201943noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15374623.post-83699968858717543492007-11-18T12:02:00.000-05:002007-11-18T12:02:00.000-05:00LuLu: thanks for your thoughts...actually, I would...LuLu: thanks for your thoughts...actually, I would never ever descriminate against any of my family, or anyone....I am very open..and very diplomatic and always was the peacemaker at my family events and being the nurse, there was also a Fix it quality to it, that for many years I was the one that strove to tend to everyone....the truth is most of my family is gone now....Over the years most died off, All the Great Aunts and Grandmother, the grandfather that I loved....and yes they were Repug Relatives I loved dearly.....<BR/><BR/>And some of the others there is distance and years that seperate...the person that damaged our family sadly was my mother, she hurt many over the years. She was manipulative and destructive, and there were issues that were untreated....and she would target different people and hurt them. When you have someone like that in your family , people pull away and get out of harms way......it is so sad.<BR/><BR/>But I was and am very grateful that I have had moments with the people in my life....<BR/><BR/>NO : namaste....thank you....enigma4everhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06589997090173140019noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15374623.post-72144844439183200672007-11-18T10:33:00.000-05:002007-11-18T10:33:00.000-05:00I'm sorry about your uncle Chuck. That was a wonde...I'm sorry about your uncle Chuck. That was a wonderful tribute. Beautifully written.Nohttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09929187212992920070noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15374623.post-12703035340039922602007-11-18T08:37:00.000-05:002007-11-18T08:37:00.000-05:00What a lovely memory of him. It's a strange thing,...What a lovely memory of him. It's a strange thing, a fractured family (mine is, too)... I have learned over time that some of the people I think wouldn't be interested in me in fact are very interested, very much wanting me to be in a family relationship to me. If there are others in your family with real potential, don't let them get away. Don't "discriminate" against them because they are relatives.Lulu Maudehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03100523351881499282noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15374623.post-2418848775706427712007-11-18T05:37:00.000-05:002007-11-18T05:37:00.000-05:00thanks mary...thanks for understanding....it took ...thanks mary...thanks for understanding....it took awhile for me to finally let go of trying and knowing that it was nothing I could fix....that is a ten mile trek.....I also have learned that there is much family along this path, and not bloodrelated...adopted.....family that I value and treasure...enigma4everhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06589997090173140019noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15374623.post-35491292738342812632007-11-18T03:56:00.000-05:002007-11-18T03:56:00.000-05:00That was a beautiful and touching tribute. Those t...That was a beautiful and touching tribute. Those times you shared together will always be with you. People come into our lives and touch us even if for a short time and help to make us who we are. It's a gift.<BR/><BR/><I>How I think I have made peace is by letting go of what I can not fix or heal</I><BR/>Right. Some things are out of our control. We have to accept that and take our self away from harmful situations. I feel your pain here. All my directness and efforts to change things or discuss things in my family are met w/denial. I want it to be different but it isn't. Slowly we drift away.Maryhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09454344516994289843noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15374623.post-53303762965089796842007-11-17T23:34:00.000-05:002007-11-17T23:34:00.000-05:00Fran: you are so wise...wiser than you know ;-)He ...Fran: you are so wise...wiser than you know ;-)<BR/><BR/>He did love the Beatles..and it is so funny, I thought , well, what a great Idea...he used to hum them all the time..and whistle ( he was a good whistler..) so set out to find a good rendering of it YouTube that was harder than I expected...but here is the thing I found it- and Paul McCartney actually explains WHY he wrote it...it is about Civil Rights, I never knew that...It really is such a beautiful song, so sweet, and yes I picture the quail in my hand when I hear it...<BR/><BR/>I just wish I had known,...and known the truth....my sister and my mom have always done this...it is their pattern to minimalize what is happening to people....it has always saddened me...and this was not the first time I found out sad news....or bad news in such a way....so I always know it will happen again...it is how they hurt people....me.....<BR/><BR/>What requires much soul searching is how to make peace with the pain they cause...and the pain and sadness of letting go of Someone Special go....but because the lesson is that I have done my best to keep my distance....but I still get hurt.....How I think I have made peace is by letting go of what I can not fix or heal...and remembering WHAT Matters...and for me...you are right it was the Bird in the hand...that moment...is to be treasured....and that he introduced my soul to Rachel Carson and the wonder of Birds in that one moment....that moment is mine...and I am so grateful...always...enigma4everhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06589997090173140019noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15374623.post-43255024988252581662007-11-17T22:47:00.000-05:002007-11-17T22:47:00.000-05:00How about *blackbird*? Take these broken wings & l...How about *blackbird*? Take these broken wings & learn to fly..... (singing bird sounds).<BR/><BR/>Anyway, nice eulogy for your Uncle Chuck.<BR/>It's important for people to know that can make peace and say goodbyes & thank yous after they have passed.<BR/><BR/>If one had to do battle with Lymphoma, a short battle would be preferred. I hope you find comfort in knowing he did not have prolonged suffering.<BR/><BR/>Uncle Chuck seemd like a nice guy, the story of holding the baby bird in hand, & the how that was a special first, was sweet. You'll always have that connection.<BR/><BR/>Rest in peace Chuck.Franhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14198689517878201943noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15374623.post-43049807615365795072007-11-17T22:18:00.000-05:002007-11-17T22:18:00.000-05:00To all thanks...it's funny...I should have blogged...To all thanks...it's funny...I should have blogged it sooner...it helped settle my heart...I still think in the future I will reach out to my aunt...I need to accept that even though there are fractures,and damage caused by others, that sometimes there is another path....I also have realized that blogging helps all of us heal as we connect and share....I have carried around some of this too long and too far....it is time to make peace with it....namaste...enigma4everhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06589997090173140019noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15374623.post-83697926326068111622007-11-17T22:12:00.000-05:002007-11-17T22:12:00.000-05:00Enigma, that was so touching and sad. My heart gr...Enigma, that was so touching and sad. My heart grieves for you and the lost to your Aunt and the rest of your family.<BR/><BR/>I lost a very close Uncle in 06 and I'm told that I haven't yet started to grief. But I think I have even though I miss the long rides to the City he lived, just to check and make sure things were always OK with him.<BR/><BR/>You express yourself so well and the life you spoke of just jumps out at you, as if you are watching the clips of what you are speaking of. Great post Enigma and I'm very sorry to hear about your lost.LET'S TALKhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06073006900180885164noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15374623.post-72082198063608723302007-11-17T21:36:00.000-05:002007-11-17T21:36:00.000-05:00Fractured families can really wreak havoc on one. ...Fractured families can really wreak havoc on one. I'm sorry you didn't get to say good bye to him.John Goodhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05362896971987049810noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15374623.post-5216499117128306412007-11-17T21:33:00.000-05:002007-11-17T21:33:00.000-05:00"Those who bring sunshine into the lives of others..."Those who bring sunshine into the lives of others cannot keep it from themselves".<BR/><BR/>James M. BarrieLarryhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05283557503536810926noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15374623.post-60638372525068694012007-11-17T18:53:00.000-05:002007-11-17T18:53:00.000-05:00song is Don't Give Up....I listened to it alot in ...song is Don't Give Up....I listened to it alot in October...it always soothes my soul....<BR/><BR/>He loved the Beatles...and folk music...but I just could not find the Right song to put up...enigma4everhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06589997090173140019noreply@blogger.com