Cyberbullying....And Why We On The Left Should Be Talking About It...

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Why Talk About Bullying ?
( Originally written and post December 7th)
I am bringing up this issue for two different reasons. I have been witnessing people on Twitter getting Bullied on a regular basis. I have witnessed the Insults and hurtful words that are thrown at different people. And I have witnessed it being perpetrated by people who say that they are on The Left . For many years many of us have dealt with Bullies that appear as Trolls from the Right Wing hurling insults at us on Blogs and Twitter, but never from our Own Side. I have even see good people leave Twitter due to this behavior, and people who were new to Twitter and were immediately bullied and confused and hurt they left.

I am also blogging about this because I have had to assist late at night with two suicide situations, one of which involved Twitter Bullying. I am not saying these incidents are connected, but I am trying to point out that Bullying is Dangerous and Damaging to many involved and we as a Community of Adults should be able to talk about it and Recognize it and Stop it, if it is Damaging To Our Twitter Community.
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Look Closely at this Sign, ALL of these Bullying Behaviors have been happening on Twitter, a small group has been Bullying Other Twitter Folks on the Left, for no real reason, except that they can. ALL of the Behaviors have been seen by other people as witnesses, and yet the Bullying Continues. Why Anyone on the Left would Bully Others is beyond me, this is an Election Year when Dems and those on the Left and Liberals should be coming together. Some of us have noticed that the Bullying is happening to people who are viewed not progressive enough ? Or Not Supporting Obama enough ? Could they be paid Operatives ? Why would they be so relentless ? So heartless to others on the Left ? They sometimes behave as cruelly as Right Wing Trolls ( and many of them actually are paid) , So it is a valid question.
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"I've been actually really very pleased to see how much awareness was raised around bullying, and how deeply it affects everyone. You know, you don't have to be the loser kid in high school to be bullied. Bullying and being picked on comes in so many different forms."
Lady Gaga
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Definition From Olweus.org.
The definition is below with explanation, With Asterisk****, I have elaborated how this definition corresponds to what we have been witnessing on Twitter.
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Cyber bullying is bullying through email, instant messaging (IMing), chat room exchanges, Web site posts, or digital messages or images send to a cellular phone or personal digital assistant (PDA) (Kowalski et al. 2008). Cyber bullying, like traditional bullying, involves an imbalance of power, aggression, and a negative action that is often repeated.

Cyber bullying has some rather unique characteristics that are different from traditional bullying:

Anonymity: As bad as the "bully" on the playground may be, he or she can be readily identified and potentially avoided. On the other hand, the child who cyber bullies is often anonymous. The victim is left wondering who the cyber "bully" is, which can cause a great deal of stress.

**** Instead of the "Playground" let's suppose the "Battleground" is Twitter, a giant open Chatroom, or Blogs with Comment threads, or Facebook with Comment Threads. On Twitter people have Codenames or handles, their True Idenities often hidden. This gives the Bullies more power in an uneven landscape.

Accessibility: Most children who use traditional ways of bullying terrorize their victim at school, on the bus, or walking to or from school. Although bullying can happen elsewhere in the community, there is usually a standard period of time during which these children have access to their victims. Children who cyber bully can wreak havoc any time of the day or night.

***** Please note that this site says "Children", but Adults acting like 12 year old children can also Bully other adults. Yet the Accessibility issue also is true for the Twitter landscape. On Facebook, there is a Safety division and people can be reported for behavior that is not appropriate, where as on Twitter there are no Safety Moderators to report harassing or rude behavior. So Bullies can act with abandon and no that they will not meet any fate or reprimand. No Consequences for the Bully and No Protection or course of Action for the Victim.

Punitive Fears: Victims of cyber bullying often do not report it because of: (1) fear of retribution from their tormentors, and (2) fear that their computer or phone privileges will be taken away. Often, adults' responses to cyber bullying are to remove the technology from a victim - which in their eyes can be seen as punishment.

*****On Twitter there is No Authority for the Victims to report the Bullying. Yet an interesting pattern that has occurred on Twitter that people that face off with the Bully are often later suffering Hacking or computer virus problems, which could just be an ugly coincidence that happens more often than not.

Bystanders: Most traditional bullying episodes occur in the presence of other people who assume the role of bystanders or witnesses. The phenomenon of being a bystander in the cyber world is different in that they may receive and forward emails, view web pages, forward images sent to cell phones, etc. The number of bystanders in the cyber world can reach into the millions.

*****Witnesses and Bystanders who witness Bullying on Twitter are often left trying to ascertain what to do, how to help and how to stop the Bullying.

Disinhibition: The anonymity afforded by the Internet can lead children to engage in behaviors that they might not do face-to-face. Ironically, it is their very anonymity that allows some individuals to bully at all.

******The Cyber Bully is empowered because he/she does not have to show his/her face or reveal his name, it is like being slugged in the Dark Alley by someone wearing a Mask in the dead of Night.
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I have been trying to Tweet Solidarity to the Person(s) being attacked. I have been trying to change the dialogue, to provide support to the person suffering. I have at times also been at the Brunt of this small little gang on Twitter, so I do understand how horrible it can be and how it can hurt some many involved. I don't have any solutions or answers, but I have concerns, and I can no longer be silent watching good people getting Hurt. Something has to stop this behavior on Twitter.
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From Twitter This Tweet Was Posted tonight... From John Dean::: " I'm writing on CYBERBULLYING: If you have experience(s) to share, on or off-the-record, send me a note: jwd.re.cyberbullying@gmail.com"

Suicide Prevention Tips ( For Use on Twitter/ Internet)

(originally posted 11.29.11)
(1) If you notice someone in their Timeline is Voicing Depression , Hopelessness, "Wanting To End It" Wanting Out" Etc. Do Read their Whole Page, try to see what triggered this line of thought, do see if they are talking to Anyone ? Or are they talking to themselves. If they are talking to themselves, this also means that they are still willing to talk, and NEED to talk. Do Engage, but ask quietly, nicely " Are you Ok? What is going on? I am worried about you? I care.."

(2) If they don't respond it is fine to send Tweets of comfort, hope, caring, let the person know they are not alone. That you are THERE, you are not going anywhere.

(3) This does especially come up at Holidays. If they tweet that they have reasons, let them talk, let them cuss, voice concerns, even get pissed. That is fine for if they are pissed off, or venting, atleast then they are talking, and not engaging in hurting or harming themselves.

(4) Offer to help, ask if there is anyone you can call for them, anyone that might be able to help. ( This is also to remind them that there are others close by that care about them and that would miss them. )

(5) By looking at their page try to ascertain do they have Intent, Means, ( ie weapons, alcohol, pills, drugs, razors, sharp things, even rope, hints do happen, especially on twitter ). Again do keep them talking, tweet at them , tell them they are Loved, that they matter.

(6) Do not try to deal with the Situation alone-do get help and try to work it as a team, do try to engage people that are known to the person to also help, even dig through their tweets trying to assess their followers, friends etc. If needed try to find out their name , location etc, even from the friends.

(7) If they say they want to be Dead or Dead by a certain time, and if they show photos of Plan etc. DO CALL POLICE. Be specific. If you live in another state, be emphatic when you call. Do explain why you are concerned. Do also Screen Save the Page and keep track of time called etc.

(8) As an Old ER Nurse and Old Time Blogger I have seen these situations turn out a number of ways, bottomline unless you re THERE, you don't know the facts, so you have to assume the person is in pain and needs help, so you must do what you can. If you see someone Taunting them or Bullying them , or worse Daring them Shut THAT DOWN. It is Critical, as taunting like that can literally push someone over a psychological edge. ( I mention this as there are many bullies in Cyberworld and they tend to show up during crisis times, and compassion can be lacking.) Cyber Bullying is very real , and they do say things like "Oh Just do it" "Stop Whining" etc etc. So for every tweet of compassion you send, do know that there are other tweets out there that are pushing that person, doing damage.

(9) No one due to distance and Internet constrictions, No one can make assumptions or yell at the person " attention seeking" or worse, because no one knows the state of mind of the Person Tweeting. But if they are tweeting Pain, Death Wishes etc, they must be in a good amount of pain.They Need Compassion and Help. And if a Team works together, it can make a difference.

** This page was written due to concern over an Occupy Seattle Person tonight who did have a plan and was in the middle of acting on it... and there was a massive effort to mobilize resources and help. And Police were contacted, and even Other Media searched for this person. Please know that at the different Occupy sites that there are problems of depression, PTSD and especially among Unemployed, VETS and homeless, these are Real Issues, and Real People in Real Pain.**
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National Suicide Prevention Lifeline - With Help Comes Hope
National Suicide Prevention Lifeline 1-800-273-TALK (8255): Suicide hotline, 24/ 7 free and confidential, nationwide network of crisis centers