So Cinco De Mayo Friday , admidst the King's oily plummeting Poll Numbers he was forced to plan a rather uncomfortable little Surprise Personnel Change Press Conference. Scotty the Pop N'Fresh Press Secretary could not and would not run interference for the King. ( And I could be wrong but I think piss poor 32% approval rating is indeed lower than even Nixon's Doomed Watergate Numbers). So of course at first my little suspicious Heart gave a Happy Leap of Expectation, because I was hoping that Trip Number 5 to the Grand Jury was FINALLY going to lead to The Perp-Walk Demise and Security Handcuffs for the Pompous Turd Blossum, complete with an embarrassed little "Shucks, I am So Shocked and Dissappointed" speech by the King. And we all knew that the King did not invite any Immigrants, or other Souls of Hispanic Origin to the White House for Cultural Festivities, so we knew that was not the Reason for the sudden unplanned 1:31 pm announcement of the Unexpected Announcement. Part of me thought,the hopeful "hmm" part, thought yet another unplanned departure perhaps due to the Fitz Investigation ?
It sounded like there would be limited hasty staging, No Belly Up to the Podium Moments, and no Flustery Flowery Contrived Casual Rose Garden Moments, perhaps a little Fireside Chat nostalgia ? I kept wondering would it be another little " I need to spend time with my family " Exit Speech. [ They are my favorite]. Which by now, we all know translates, " I need to spend time with my defense attorney". I know that when Ms. Gale Norton spoke about Family Time at her Resignation Moment , I was not the only one that said /thought :" Hmmm, I wonder if those Did-Not-Happen-Cause-There-Aren't-Any-Friggin'-Photos Meetings with Casino Jack at the White House are a Problem at some point ???" We haven't seen pictures of Ms.Gale or even Ms.I-Worked-for-Rove-and-Abramoff Susan Ralston at any great Native American Gatherings or Events now have we ? Yet we have also learned in the past week that due to Secret Service records that were Requested, and Finally Made Public, it did indeed turn out that the Mr.Abramoff did indeed recieve Clearance to the White House for over 200 Visits in even the first 10 monthes of the Bush Administration's Reign. Yet somehow That Jack-Came-Up-The-Hill News became ecllipsed this week due to the Top Gun Connections to some questionable Activities over at the Wonderous Watergate....
But No?! it was not Bush's Brain facing exit plans, it was the always tanned-yet-not-handsome-oily-haired Porter Goss looking peevish and sweaty and less than happy. And the King also looked unsettled in a My Pet Goat Kind of Way. And now today the Blogatopia Airwaves are alive with Juicy Rumors that perhaps attach the Patriotic Mr. Goss to the Steamy Unseemly Scandals that are forthcoming having to do with Top Gun connections to some Working Women providing "entertainment" during card games at the Watergate. ( And I had to down a gallon of Maalox trying to save my intestinal fortitude from the ravages of the visual image of the Dukestar recieving a Lap Dance... and yet I do find myself wanting to see THOSE photos). And the names and images are more complicated than a dusty tangled aged tawdry sex drenched episode of DALLAS or DYNASTY. And I reflect on that Press Conference and the hasty illcontrived empty Announcement and I realize that NO Real Reasons were given for Mr.Goss's Hasty Retreat. NONE. No Sympathy eliciting " Health Problems" or even the Obligatory "Family Emergency ", or the vague yet honorable "He needs time with Family" was thrown into the Spinning Airwaves.The body language of the two men was stunning,an uncomfortable gin soaked moment, like that of two men at a Bar that have just realized that perhaps "Favors" and "Secrets" had been mutually shared with the same woman or women....working women. Oh, wait that would be like a scene off the ol' DALLAS show...so that would just be too Indelicate for this Patriotic Time of Wholesome Values.
Many Many years ago on Sanibel Island I had a close friend ( a bit of a philosophical Lush,prone to spewing BS ) say that On Cinco De Mayo it is indeed a Date with Fate to See the Worm in the bottem of the Tequilla Bottle, and who ever eats IT will have an Amazing One of a kind Memorable Year. ( the Enigma did not drink from the bottle, as she is too squeemish around people eating worms and also doesn't like hard alcohol, too many years of working ER and seeing the Worm results....)
( Irony is a bitter thing, it was many years ago- and at that time Mr. Porter Goss was running for Political Leadership of the Island and was even editing a little newspaper, such a Mover and a Shaker....such a Patriotic Guy).
I doubt that West Wing Enchiladas were shared on the Patio last night at a Private Cozy Little Farewell Goss Dinner ....perhaps even some Tequila was sipped while the Mariachi Band played on and one as the Deck Chairs were yet again rearranged. And the cynical part of me could not help but wonder Who did Eat the Worm in the Bottle of That Bottle.... Or did they share ?